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Fresh off the release of his Netflix special Empty Nester, comedian Chad Daniels stars in a new PETA video alongside partner and fellow comedian Kelsey Cook that hilariously imagines a world in which humans are treated like “outdoor cats”—and reminds viewers that the life-threatening hazards feline companions face outside are no laughing matter. In the video, Daniels is shooed outside by Cook and left to fend for himself in the not-so-great outdoors—and he’s got some harsh words for his irresponsible guardian.
“Do you have any idea how many diseases I can get out here? Hookworms, ringworm, rabies, ticks, toxoplasmosis, pasteurellosis, Campylalalal … I’m gonna catch something I can’t even pronounce!” Daniels says. “Ear mites, Giardia, feline herpesvirus—if I get herpes because of you, I’m gonna be so friggin’ pissed.”
“If I live inside, my life expectancy is 12 to 20 years,” Daniels says. “But you leave me out here, I’m not gonna make it to my fifth birthday.”
The Outdoors Is a Huge Threat to Cats’ Lives
According to the American Veterinary Medical Association, the majority of reported cat deaths outdoors are caused by trauma, most commonly due to being hit by cars or attacked by roaming dogs. Some cruel people poison, shoot, burn, drown, or otherwise torture and kill cats. Being outdoors also increases the odds that a cat will freeze or starve to death, succumb to parasites, contract deadly contagious diseases, or endure countless other horrific fates.
Cats Left to Roam Outdoors Also Cause Trauma
Companion cats allowed to roam outside may occasionally bring home a dead mouse or bird, but this represents just a fraction of the animals they maim and leave for dead.
No matter how well fed they are, cats are instinctively driven to hunt, and as a nonnative predator species, they don’t fit into U.S. ecosystems. Roaming cats are the number one direct deadly threat to American birds. They kill an estimated 1.3 to 4 billion birds and 6.3 to 22.3 billion mammals every year in the U.S. alone. Free-roaming cats have also contributed to the extinction of 63 species of birds, mammals, and reptiles.
Cats Don’t Belong Outdoors
The best thing you can do for your cat is to keep them safe inside with you, for their own sake and for that of the wild animals they prey on when left outside. If your cat is eager to explore the outdoors, you can give them opportunities to do so under supervision. Cats should be allowed outdoors only for walks on leashes that are attached to well-fitting harnesses designed for cats. Not every cat can get used to a harness and leash, though, so if you’ve given it your best effort and they’re not comfortable, stick to a window perch or a catio.
To learn more about how you can provide your cat with enrichment indoors, check out PETA President Ingrid Newkirk’s book 250 Vital Things Your Cat Wants You to Know (aka “the cat guardian’s Bible”):
